Woman Rejects Engagement Ring Originally Bought For BF's Ex, Debate Ensues

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    Text - My now fiancé was engaged a couple years before we got together, and they broke up and she gave the ring back.
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    Text - Text - We've been together a few years and a few days ago, he proposed and I was super excited. The ring looked kinda familiar and when I asked him where it was from, he said it was the ring he gave to ex fiancé. I immediately took it off and was like "I don't want a ring you bought for someone else, it wasn't meant for me." He got upset and said it didn't matter, because it's not hers anymore it's mine. My
  • 03
    Text - Text - matter, because it's not hers anymore it's mine. My family and friends are split in saying I'm the asshole and I'm justified. I don't want him to spend a whole other thousand dollars on a ring for me, but I want a ring that was meant for me, not for someone else.
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    Text - Text - amicia_derune Asshole Enthusiast [5] 8.8k points · 5 days ago NTA. This is ridiculous, how dare he give you her ring. It's HER ring, he meant it for HER, bought it for HER. How does he think to give you her rejects is ok? You are completely justified. And I would rethink this guy if I were you.
  • 05
    Text - lizhorcajo Partassipant [1] 2.8k points 5 days ago Oh wow... Definitely NTA, are you serious? What kind of guy does that. I would be pissed and would have reacted the same way.
  • 06
    Text - Text - lefrench75 391 points 4 days ago The only way this would be acceptable is if the ring were a family heirloom that was passed down to him. In that case, it'd have meaning independent of his ex- fiancée. OP already said that this isn't the case, so he's clearly the AH here.
  • 07
    Text - Text - MissPlaceDApostrophe 83 points · 4 days ago My dad did it when he proposed to my mom. She didn't care. His two older sisters did. A lot. Mom got a new ring. They've been married for over 50 years. However, that's their story. Anyone who is pissed at getting a ring recycled from a prior fiancee is NTA. At all!
  • 08
    Text - GR IPAS Asshole Enthusiast [9] 592 points · 5 days ago NTA. Lmao, in what universe did he think that was going to fly?
  • 09
    Text - Text - booksandcheesedip Partassipant [3] 456 points · 5 days ago NTA- that is tacky as hell of him to give you that ring. You should get a ring that is meant for you, not a recycled engagement ring from his last fiancée. I get being frugal but this is too much
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    Text - Text - ManiaSky 356 points 5 days ago NTA, and this is coming from someone who thinks engagement rings are a stupid waste of money. I'm sure he could sell the ring and get a new one that would be special to you. I don't think he's being TA either though, he's just not seeing it the same way you do. Selling the old ring would be a good compromise.
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    Text - Text - threekidsnomoney 256 points · 5 days ago NAH - He's not an asshole for giving you that ring unless he knew ahead of time that it would cause you displeasure. You're not an asshole for not wanting a significant possession that was originally given to another person. I think both of you should take a step back and make clear that no matter what the ring looks like, you two want to be together forever. That's the most important part of the proposal :)
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    Text - Text - al-sal-13 6 points · 4 days ago I don't agree. It seems like it should be pretty obvious that someone wouldn't want a hand me down ring tbh. At the very least, when she expressed displeasure he should have immediately offered to go with her to exchange it for one she liked better. NTA
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    Text - Text - mymorningkiller 103 points · 5 days ago NTA. The ring is supposed to be a symbol of love and commitment to/for you. Not something he gives out to different people until someone finally accepts it or goes through with marrying him. He could have taken the ring back or kept it for sentimental reasons, but giving it to another SO is unacceptable. The only exception would be if it's a family heirloom (doesn't seem to be the case here). You're totally fine not accepting a ring meant for
  • 14
    Text - SomeArbitraryJoe Asshole Enthusiast [5] 71 points 5 days ago NTA. No one should be expected to walk around with a constant reminder of their partner's ex on their finger. That's disturbing.
  • 15
    Text - cranberry58 17 points · 4 days ago It is a symbol of the promise they are making to one another. I would rather have an engagement ring from a bubble gum machine than one from a broken engagement. All that ring represents is a broken promise. This ring is not a practical gift.

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